PB&J Otter: A Sitter For Butter
by HoohawPoodle
Summary: Everyone in Lake Hoohaw plans to see a hot new comedy movie. Only one catch - poor Baby Butter is too young to go to the movies, per theater policy! Will someone volunteer to stay behind and babysit her?


(Disclaimer: All characters and entities are the property of their respective owners.)

A Fan-Written _PB&J Otter _Episode

**Cast of Canon Characters (speaking):**

Peanut Otter

Jelly Otter

Baby Butter Otter

Ernest Otter

Opal Otter

Pinch Raccoon

Flick Duck

Ootsie Snootie

Bootsie Snootie

Mayor Jeff

Edouard Snootie

Georgina Snootie

Walter Raccoon

**Episode Song:** "Till The Morn"

**"A Sitter For Butter"**

(The episode opens with an aerial view of Lake Hoohaw at around 2:30 p.m.)

Opal (V.O.): "A Sitter For Butter"

(The scene changes to inside the Otters' houseboat, where PB&J are helping Opal clean up the kitchen after lunch.)

Jelly: *scrubs a saucepan and hands it to Opal* Here you go Mama, a sparkling saucepan.

Opal: You kids are certainly the best when it comes to helping around the house, especially while your dad's working. *hangs up the saucepan on the pot rack on the ceiling*

Peanut: Got six more plates here! *holds a stack of six clean plates and puts them in the cabinet*

Baby Butter: Cleany-weany!

Jelly: Finally, our afternoon chores are finished.

Opal: That's great! *hugs PB&J* You guys can go watch TV if you want.

PB&J: Yay!

(PB&J run into the living room and sit on the couch. Peanut grabs the remote and switches on the TV.)

Peanut and Jelly: Alright! _Recess_!

(The beginning of the episode "Mikey's Pants" is shown on the TV. Gus struggles to pull out a kickball stuck under a bench.)

Gus (on TV): *grunts* It's stuck!

Mikey (on TV): No problem, Gus. It'll be my pleasure to help you out. I'll just lift up the bench! *bends down and rips his pants*

(PB&J laugh at the scene. A short time later, a movie trailer comes on that catches their attention.)

Announcer (on TV): He's back...

(In the commercial, someone's footsteps walk down a city sidewalk.)

Announcer (on TV): A new case...

(A door opens to reveal Norman Hughes, a Jack Russell terrier secret agent in a suit and trench coat. PB&J gasp in surprise.)

Jelly: Norman Hughes!

Peanut: The funniest spy there is!

Announcer (on TV): And he's even hotter on the tail.

Norman (on TV): *in a Yorkshire accent* This lad's up to summat.

(A montage of clips show Norman in various acts, including comedic melee combat, car chases, and infiltrating a base. A final clip shows him jumping towards an open door to run in, only to bump into Saranwrap and fall over. PB&J laugh even harder.)

Norman (on TV): *stands up covered in Saranwrap, looking at the camera* I guess they're not called tricksters for nowt.

Announcer (on TV): _Norman Hughes: The Sigma Keys_. Rated PG. Starting today in theaters everywhere.

Peanut: Wow! We've gotta see that movie tonight!

Jelly: Let's tell Mama about it!

Baby Butter: Yay! *giggles*

(Opal walks into the living room, hearing the commotion.)

Opal: What's all the excitement about?

Peanut: There's a brand new Norman Hughes movie!

Jelly: It looked so funny!

Baby Butter: Funny funny!

Opal: *sits down at her computer and reaches a movie ticket website* Let me see if we can grab tickets for a showing tonight.

Peanut and Jelly: Alright! *they high five each other*

Opal: Let's see...there's a 7 o'clock showing at AMC 20 Hoohaw Vista Mall.

Jelly: That's not far from here at all!

Opal: *clicks to add tickets* Daddy will already be off work by then, so two adults...two children ages 4 to 10... *gasps*

Peanut: What's wrong?

Opal: According to this, it says no children under three allowed for a movie showing!

(PB&J's jaws drop in shock.)

PB&J: Huh?!

Jelly: But Baby Butter loves to watch movies!

Opal: I'm sorry kids, but we could find a babysitter to look after her.

Peanut: We don't know of any sitters in Lake Hoohaw.

Opal: *on a babysitter hiring website* Hmmm, it shows only one babysitter on this site, but it says she called in sick for this week.

PB&J: Aww. *they walk away with their heads hung low*

(The scene changes to PB&J's bedroom upstairs.)

Jelly: I don't get it, Peanut. It's no use leaving Baby Butter at home while we see this exciting new movie.

Peanut: And it's even more bizarre that the only professional adult babysitter in the area took sick.

Jelly: Hmm. This calls for one thing in particular...

Peanut: *sighs* Really?

Jelly: Hit it!

(Suddenly the background changes to blue with various objects - a Noodle Dance has started with the music to go with it too. Jelly and Baby Butter start dancing while Peanut scowls with his eyes closed and arms folded. Soon enough, however, he gives in.)

Voiceovers (singing): _Noodle! Use your noodle!_

_Noodle! Do the Noodle Dance!_

Jelly: *a light bulb appears above her head as the background returns to reality* I've got it!

Peanut: *stops dancing* W-what? Let's hear it.

Jelly: Let's make a radar device so we can call in all babysitters within ten miles to choose the right one!

(A fantasy sequence shows Jelly with a radar device in her hands. She pushes a button, sending radio waves and prompting several potential babysitters to fly in. The scene changes back to reality.)

Peanut: That doesn't make much sense. We would need advanced scientific knowledge.

Jelly: Hmmm... If Butter can't go to the movies, and if anyone else wants to see - *gasps* That's it!

Peanut: What is it, Jel?

Jelly: Let's rally up everyone in Lake Hoohaw to see if they'd do a fine job looking after her.

Peanut: Tender!

(The scene switches outdoors, where the entire community is gathered near Oaky Oak Tree, talking amongst themselves.)

Flick: Cheese and quackers, what's taking so long?

Pinch: It's only for the best, Flick. It could be anything.

Ootsie: All this?

Bootsie: For something organized by a kid of all people?

Ootsie and Bootsie: How original.

Jelly: *standing in front of the crowd* May I have everyone's attention, please?

(The crowd dies down.)

Jelly: So, how many of you want to see _Norman Hughes: The Sigma Keys _tonight at the mall?

(The crowd cheers.)

Jelly: Good news first. The good news is this movie is supposed to be even better than the first. The bad news is, Baby Butter's too young to go to the movies and we can't find a babysitter. One of you will have to look after her.

Flick: What do you mean? It's only rated PG! What's the point of Butter staying home when her parents are going? *chuckles*

Bootsie: *elbows Flick in the arm* Knock it off, Flick.

Mayor Jeff: I'd gladly accept the position since I looked after you and your siblings before, Jelly. Unfortunately I have to track some timber deliveries downstream at Holy-Schnikes Gulch.

Walter: And I have to collect trash and recycling.

(The crowd talks among themselves more.)

Jelly: Any other takers?

Bootsie (off-screen): I'll do it!

Jelly: Who was that?

Bootsie: *steps out from the crowd* I'm completely up for staying at your house to look after your adorable baby sister.

Jelly: I'm...well...

Ootsie: Bootsie?! How could you?

Bootsie: You okay, Jelly?

Peanut: Sorry, Bootsie. I guess she's a bit...surprised.

Jelly: But...what about Ootsie? You're never really seen without him.

Ootsie: Oh, my twin sister can handle situations independently. Ain't that right, Bootsie?

Bootsie: One hundred percent true, Ootsie. *laughs with Ootsie*

Mayor Jeff: *turns to the crowd* Well, seeing how this is turning out, Bootsie may be the one to babysit for the Otters.

Edouard: Hang tight there, Bootsie, you'll get a substantial amount of assistance. *takes out his Muttorola BoneTAC cell phone and dials a number* Hello, Michelle?

Michelle (on the other line): Hi, Mr. Snootie.

Edouard: You have any idea how much an upgraded Technonanny 2600 costs?

Michelle (on the other line): About four to six hundred dollars.

Edouard: Splendid! Could I -

Bootsie: Father, WAIT!

Edouard: *to Michelle* Hold on a second. *puts his hand over the cell phone's mouthpiece and turns to Bootsie* What is it, Bootsie?

Bootsie: Remember that fishing machine? The high-tech hiking equipment? The Soccertronic 3750? Those were actually pretty useless. I'd like to experience the joy and responsibility of looking after a child the real way.

Edouard: Hmmmm... *on the phone* Never mind, Michelle. So sorry.

Michelle (on the other line): No problem, Mr. Snootie. Have a fabulous day.

Edouard: And have an especially rich rich day. *hangs up*

(Meanwhile, PB&J are in a huddle a few yards away.)

Jelly: Well, _that _was shocking.

Peanut: Bootsie of all people? What has gotten into her head? She and Ootsie are basically polar opposites of all of us.

Jelly: Think about it, Peanut. How would you exactly picture Bootsie as a babysitter?

Peanut: Hoo boy. Bootsie babysitting...

(A fantasy sequence starts. Bootsie is in the kitchen reading _The Good Soldier _when Baby Butter holds up a drawing of her imaginary elephant friend, Buddy, to show Bootsie.)

Baby Butter: Buddy!

Bootsie: *not glancing up from her book* Eh.

(Then it shows Bootsie eating a bag of Tostitos chips while watching a stand-up comedy on TV. Baby Butter runs around the house making siren sounds.)

Female comedian: So then I think to myself, "Well..." *cut off by Baby Butter's siren emulation*

Bootsie: *sighs* Thanks for letting me miss this lady's punch line, you little idiot. *uses the remote to rewind the show*

(Then it shows Bootsie talking on her bone phone to Ootsie as Baby Butter stands waiting for attention, looking sad.)

Bootsie: But this little otter! Oh! A brain the size of a minuscule grain of _sand_, and an attention span shorter than a monkey on espresso!

Ootsie (on the other line): Oh, Bootsie, you're soooo uptight!

(Bootsie laughs meanly with Ootsie over the phone.)

Baby Butter: *teary-eyed* Mama.

(The scene changes back to reality.)

Peanut: Darn. I guess I went too far.

Jelly: Don't worry, Baby Butter. It won't be that bad. We'll always think of you while we're away.

Baby Butter: Okay. *smiles a little*

(The scene changes to 6:30 p.m with a view of the Otters' houseboat at twilight. Ernest, Opal, and PB&J are sitting together in the living room, having gotten ready for the night.)

Ernest: Well, the Snooties should be here any minute to pick us up.

Opal: We've got a set of tips and instructions for Bootsie so that she feels comfortable looking after our sweet Baby Butter.

Jelly: It feels weird still being here with everyone else gone.

(Suddenly there's a knock on the front door. Opal answers it to reveal all four of the Snooties. Bootsie is carrying a yellow backpack.)

Edouard, Georgina, Ootsie, and Bootsie: Oodelay, Mrs. Otter!

Opal: Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Snootie.

Jelly: Hey, Ootsie and Bootsie.

Ernest: You ready to look after the house for us, Bootsie?

Bootsie: Oh, Mr. Otter, I have the tools of the trade right here. *takes off her backpack and puts it on the floor by the couch*

Edouard: Now Bootsie, if you need any of us, you know my number.

Ootsie: You sure you wanna stay here? You're missing out on a fun-filled movie night!

Bootsie: Oh, I can always see it another day.

Georgina: I also packed some extra toiletries just in case you need them.

Bootsie: Thanks, Mother.

Opal: *hands Baby Butter to Bootsie who holds her* Our number is on a Post-It note on the fridge along with some other instructions.

Bootsie: Understood. *hugs her parents and Ootsie* I love you all so very much.

Edouard: Hmm, we'd best hit the road now. *opens the front door, about to step out* Georgina's SUV is parked outside so you guys can all ride in style! *barks*

Ootsie: I call first dibs on the radio station!

Bootsie: Bye Mother! Bye Daddy!

Edouard: Ta-ta. *steps out with Georgina*

Peanut and Jelly: Bye Bootsie! *they step out*

Jelly: We love you, Baby Butter!

Bootsie: *to Baby Butter* Say bye-bye! *waves with her*

Baby Butter: Bye-bye.

Ernest: We're counting on you, Bootsie.

Opal: You can do it.

Bootsie: Thanks for believing in me.

(The others get into a champagne-colored luxury SUV with tan leather interior and buckle their seat belts. Georgina starts the car, puts it in drive, and drives off as Ootsie rolls down the right rear window. Bootsie stands in front of the houseboat, holding Butter and waving goodbye.)

Peanut, Jelly, and Ootsie: BYE BOOTSIE! BYE BUTTER!

Bootsie: Bye guys! Have a fabulous night!

(Carrying Butter, Bootsie goes back into the Otters' houseboat, closes the door, sets Butter down, and smiles.)

Bootsie: Well? We have the whole house to ourselves!

(Baby Butter plops onto the floor, giggling.)

Bootsie: Oops! Hehehehe! I've got a backpack full of fun stuff, just for you. *tickles Butter's cheek*

(They head into the living room and sit down on the floor. Bootsie unzips her backpack and searches the contents inside.)

Bootsie: Let's see what we have in here... *gasps and pulls out a blue and white baseball-themed jack-in-the-box* What's this, Butter? *sets it down in front of Butter* What is it? Can you say "jack-in-the-box"?

Baby Butter: Da da da!

(Bootsie starts to crank the handle on the jack-in-the-box, prompting its gentle-sounding music box to play "Take Me Out To The Ball Game". She starts to sing along.)

Bootsie: _Take me out to the ball game_

_Take me out with the crowd_

_Buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jacks_

_I don't care if I never get back_

_Let us root, root, root for the home team_

_If they don't win it's a shame_

_For it's one, two..._

(The jack-in-the-box opens and _SPROING!_ a baseball-headed player pops out, making Baby Butter laugh hard.)

Bootsie: _...three strikes you're out at the old ball game! _*speaking* Yaaaaay! *claps her hands*

Baby Butter: *flails her arms* Again, again!

Bootsie: *giggles* Okay!

(She cranks the handle again, and the jack-in-the-box pops out yet again on the "three" note, prompting Butter to laugh once more.)

Bootsie: *reaches into her bag* Ooooh, look Butter! *pulls out an old Colorforms set titled Things That Go, with stickers of cars, trucks, boats, and other vehicles* Colorforms! I played with these all the time as a tot. This one was my favorite - Things That Go.

(Several minutes later, Bootsie and Baby Butter have stuck a few different stickers on one of the posters that came with the set, in this case a downtown setting.)

Bootsie: Next stop, Poplar Street and 28th Avenue. *picks up a city bus sticker and sticks it onto the street, emulating the sound of air brakes* Your turn, Butter.

(Baby Butter finds a sticker of a paper boy on a bicycle.)

Bootsie: A paper boy. Where should we put him? How about... *points to an open space on the sidewalk* ...here on the sidewalk?

(Baby Butter proceeds to place the sticker on that open space.)

Bootsie: Beautiful! Good job!

(Baby Butter starts to cry a little.)

Bootsie: What's the matter, Butter? *sniffs a stench coming from Butter's diaper and coughs* Oh, you need a serious diaper change. Up you go. *picks her up and takes her to the bathroom*

(A minute later, Bootsie opens the bathroom door and comes out.)

Bootsie: All powdered up and a fresh new diaper. Feel better, honey?

(Butter nods yes. The scene changes to Bootsie engaged in a game of hide-and-seek, counting while covering her eyes.)

Bootsie: Eight...nine...ten. *uncovers her eyes* Ready or not, here I come!

(Bootsie walks upstairs and looks in the bathroom, behind the shower curtain, in the hall closet, and in PB&J's bedroom under the bunk bed before she hears soft giggling, presumably coming from the top bunk.)

Bootsie: Oooh, getting closer.

(She then slips her blue high heels off, revealing her pink human-like feet, and climbs up the ladder to the top bunk. She softly pulls the covers down to reveal a smiling Baby Butter.)

Bootsie: *grins and wiggles her fingers* The Tickle Patrol is on the lookout for a sweet baby otter! Tiiiiiime foooooor sooooooome TICKLES!

(Bootsie tickles Baby Butter on the stomach, making Butter laugh hysterically.)

Bootsie: Coochie coochie coochie coo! *giggles and continues tickling Baby Butter all over*

(The scene changes to everyone else inside the movie theater during a tender love scene, facing the seats.)

Girl in movie (off-screen, in a heavy German accent): Oh Norman, zis moment is _wunderbar_.

(We now see the girl who just spoke, a beautiful white Persian cat with wavy blonde hair and burgundy lips, wearing a blue dress. She is sitting on the hillside in Monaco with Norman.)

Norman: If only it lasted forever, Ingrid. I never knew it would be easy to find a woman with such...elegance.

Ingrid: _Lebe zweimal für morgen, mein Junge. _Live twice for tomorrow.

(Pinch wipes away a tear with a tissue, obviously touched by the scene.)

Pinch: *whispers* So beautiful.

Ootsie: *whispers* Hopefully she's not on the villain's side. *tosses some popcorn into his mouth*

Flick: *out loud* Hey Ootsie, you should -

Ootsie: *puts up a finger to his mouth* Shhh! *whispers* Whisper it to me.

Flick: *whispers* You should call Bootsie and see how things are going while she's watching Butter.

Ootsie: *whispers* But I don't wanna miss anything by going outside into the hallway to use my cell phone.

Flick: *whispers* I'll give you Mallard Man issue 91!

Ootsie: *not whispering, but in a very quiet voice, mocks Flick in a whiny tone* "I'll give you Mallard Man issue..." *points his finger in the direction of the theater screen and says sternly* Flick, just watch the movie.

(Flick sighs as he and Ootsie turn back to the movie. Norman and Ingrid are about to kiss when suddenly a great horned owl screeches and pushes Norman, causing him to yelp and roll down the hill in a comedic manner. Everyone in the theater laughs hard.)

(The scene changes back to the houseboat. Bootsie has her shoes back on, and she and Baby Butter slide down to the kitchen and play airplane, with Bootsie holding Baby Butter by the torso and walking around the house. Butter laughs as Bootsie makes whooshing noises.)

Bootsie: Beginning our initial descent into Lake Hoohaw! *makes a whooshing noise as she gently sets Baby Butter down* All this fun playtime is making me hungry. How about you?

Baby Butter: *nods yes* Yum yum!

(Bootsie then walks into the kitchen and takes a note off the refrigerator, reading it silently.)

Bootsie: I'm gonna make you a nice bottle of milk and formula just like your mommy does. *opens Butter's bottle, pours in some baby formula and some fresh milk, puts the lid back on, and gives it to Baby Butter* Here you go, my sweet pea! *kisses her on the cheek*

(Butter holds the bottle with two hands and instantly sucks the bottle, drinking her milk as she waddles toward the living room.)

Bootsie: As for me... hey Butter, what if we ordered a pizza for us to share? *gets her bone phone and dials for pizza*

Baby Butter: Pizza pizza pizza! *claps her hands*

(At the pizza parlor, a young, tattooed hipster jaguar with a handlebar mustache answers the phone.)

Solomon: Pizza Kingdom of Lake Hoohaw. Hail to the king. This is Solomon, how may I help you tonight?

Bootsie: Hello Solomon. I'd like to order a medium pizza with an Alfredo base, house cheese blend, pepperoni, fresh buffalo mozzarella, and ricotta.

Solomon: No problem. Anything else for you?

Bootsie: No, that'll do.

Solomon: May I ask for your name and delivery address, please?

Bootsie: Absolutely. My name is Bootsie Snootie, and drop it off at 5 Lake Hoohaw Trail.

Solomon: Okey-dokey. It'll be a total of $15.13. Your pizza should be delivered in about twenty minutes, and you can just pay the delivery driver.

Bootsie: Thank you so much! Okay, bye!

Solomon: Buh-bye. *they both hang up*

Bootsie: Wanna go outside and see the stars, Baby Butter?

Baby Butter: *nods yes*

Bootsie: Let me grab a pop from the fridge and then we'll go out, okay?

(They go out the front door and across the sidewalk to the grass. Bootsie lays a beach towel on the grass and lays down with Butter.)

Bootsie: It's strange that there's no one else here in Lake Hoohaw but you and me. *opens her soda can and takes a sip* I know of something else we can play.

Baby Butter: Oh?

Bootsie: *calls up to the night sky* ECHO! *her call echoes* Now you try.

Baby Butter: Aaaaaaa! *it echoes and she giggles*

Bootsie: Nice! *calls up again* LAKE HOOHAW IS THE BEST! *it echoes* Can you howl like a wolf?

(She takes a deep breath and does an amazing emulation of a wolf howling, like she did in "The Greatest Sleepover Ever". Of course, it echoes, and Baby Butter claps and does her own wolf howl, echoing again.)

Bootsie: Your howl is really great for a little otter like you.

(There is the sound of a vehicle approaching and reflections from headlights.)

Baby Butter: Mama?

Bootsie: No Butter, that's the pizza man.

(A crimson pickup truck with the Pizza Kingdom logo on the side pulls up. A chimpanzee delivery guy gets out of the driver's seat and walks up.)

Delivery guy: Got a pizza for Bootsie?

Bootsie: That's me! Here you are. *hands him a $20 bill and takes the pizza box* You can keep the change. Have a great night.

Delivery guy: You too. Take care. *he drives off*

Bootsie: Want a slice?

Baby Butter: Pizza!

Bootsie: That's right, pizza! *pulls out a slice of pizza and gives it to Butter before getting a slice for herself, then they start eating* Mmmmmmm, this pizza is out of this world. The crust is crispy and chewy, the pepperoni is spicy, and the cheese is just authentic and gooey! Good stuff, huh Butter?

Baby Butter: Yummy yummy!

Bootsie: *gasps and sees a shooting star* Look Butter! A shooting star! The first time I've seen one in person!

Baby Butter: Oooh, ahhh.

(After they finish dinner and head back inside, Bootsie grabs two puppets and does some ventriloquism to play with Butter some more. One puppet is a carrot with a kilt, a bonnet with a ribbon, and a bagpipe. The other is a female banana with red lips and a colorful dress. Bootsie puts both arms in either puppet.)

Bootsie: Look who I have, Butter! Hamish McCarrot and Señora Banana! *through Hamish, in a Scottish accent* Aye, it's great to meet ya, Butter. You're a fine toaty lassie. *through Señora Banana, in a Mexican accent* _Muy feliz _to be here, my little _amiga__! _*through Hamish* My mum called me that sometimes back in Glasgow. *through Señora Banana* So that must mean your _mamá_ wasn't a true Scotswoman! _¡Venga venga!_

(Bootsie has the two puppets play-fight each other, making Baby Butter laugh hard.)

Bootsie: *through Hamish* Ya know, Butter, I've got a bagpipe just like your dad's. *in her own voice* Oh, really? It has such a wonderful sound! How about a little ditty for us?

(Bootsie presses a button inside the puppet, playing the sound of a bagpipe, then moves the puppet back and forth as Baby Butter laughs and claps. Soon enough, Butter yawns, indicating that she's tired.)

Bootsie: Awwww, are you sleepy? Is it time for you to go night-night?

(She picks Butter up and carries her upstairs to PB&J's bedroom, then sits on the bottom bunk and starts gently rocking Butter in her arms as she begins to sing a lullaby.)

Bootsie: _Huddled in my arms tonight_

_Safe in here till you see the light_

_All the good things you bring to me_

_They open my mind to possibility_

_Till the morn, please close your eyes_

_The world's asleep, you'll soon realize_

_Peace on Earth, good will towards all men_

_I know we'll stay together then_

_'Cause I'll always believe in you_

_My father always said to stand my ground_

_To spread upon my friends a gentle sound_

_I used to shrug it off and tease my peers_

_But I've changed now, I regret those years_

_Till the morn, please close your eyes_

_The world's asleep, you'll soon realize_

_Peace on Earth, good will towards all men_

_I know we'll stay together then_

_'Cause I'll always believe in you_

(And just like that, Butter is sound asleep. The bedroom door opens quietly to reveal the Otters and the Snooties, having returned from their movie.)

Bootsie: *whispers* Night night, Baby Butter. *kisses her on the forehead, then sees the others* She's fast asleep.

Opal: *whispers* I _knew _you could do it, Bootsie!

(Bootsie then pulls them into a group hug. The scene changes to back downstairs in the living room.)

Bootsie: ...and we tickled each other, ordered some pizza, saw a shooting star, played with some Colorforms and puppets... all kinds of fun stuff! So... how was the movie?

Ootsie: Oh! Bootsie, you would have adored it!

Peanut: It was awesome!

Jelly: The entire audience was laughing!

Edouard: The acting, the musical score...

Georgina: The costumes...

Edouard: You name it! Everything was truly capital! *barks*

Bootsie: Don't spoil it for me too much now, I wanna see it too!

(Everyone laughs as the camera switches outdoors and pans up to the bright crescent moon before the screen fades to black.)


End file.
